Ariel Germain

Let’s use our imaginations for a moment. Imagine that you are a female graduate of Princeton University.

You studied business marketing, you had internships all four years and employers are seeking you.

Would you give that up in 2 to 3 years to become a housewife?

Would you give up your six-figure salary to depend on your spouse and be a “mini-van mom?”

Three weeks ago, the New York Times published an article on Ivy League women who decided to hang up their Armani suits for milk-stained T-shirts and soccer games.

After reading this article, I wondered if this decision was common among women here at N.C. Central University and at other HBCUs.

Would you give up your education and career to become a stay-at-home mother and wife?

I asked student-athlete and mother of one Shawanda Hill.

With a frown of disapproval, she said she could never give up her career goals for anything.

She said if she did that and her husband left, she and her baby would have nothing.

I was sure that the rest of my interviews would be similar until I spoke with Denise Rose, a friend from Howard University.

She informed me that she and her boyfriend had been together for several years and planned to marry in June following graduation.

She said she would not see becoming a stay-at-home wife and mother as abandoning her education or career, but as starting something new.

She said she wanted to support her future husband and be there for him because he would need a push to become a professional.

“Are you serious?” I thought.

I was shocked to that the only thing she wanted to do after studying hard and maintaining a 3.4 GPA at Howard University was to focus on her boyfriend’s future. I wondered, was I missing something by not having a long-term relationship? Maybe Shawanda and I were misunderstanding the whole idea of commitment. But when I asked 27-year-old wife and mother of two Talisha Peterson of Virginia Beach if she would give up her career for her husband, I felt a little better. Talisha said never in a million years would she depend on a spouse; she wants her children to see an independent black woman who stands beside her husband, not behind him.

So who is making the best career decision for themselves and their families?

Ultimately, that decision is up to you.